Toughest Decision ever! Br@ces On!

Look at the new ticker widget on the right side. isn't it cool?

After decades of consideration, I have finally done it, yes, br@ces. The main reason I am doing it, is because of my ugly underbite, where the lower jaw has 'come' forward in order to bite together. I am afraid that the jaw will progressively get worse and even more forward, as I age.

Other secondary reasons are:
1) a very small amount of the cost can be claimed from my company
2) no upfront teeth extraction

At later stage, if the results are not satisfactory, I may still need to go for extractions, but hopefully not. Another lucky thing is that, I need not put on separators prior to br@ces, because by default, the orthodontist doesn't use molar bands. I am happy that I am spared from the pain.

This is the second dental clinic I consulted. First one is near my house but orthodontist wanted extractions and duration would take 2.5 to 3 years. I am against extractions, as my teeth are in good condition. Unless I have cavity on those teeth, if not it is really a pity to remove them. I am a frugal girl, you see.

It costs near to $4.2k for this second clinic. The orthodontist seems like a nice person. Hope she is really good at br@ces.

When I first put on, there was the discomfort but pain hasn't kicked in yet. After hours, the suffering started. And I regretted, why I was so foolish to pay large sum of money to torture myself. Soft diet, and I was constantly hungry, and hence always moody. I realised I need to eat a lot more, so that I won't have second thoughts.

The worst is when I sleep at night, and accidentally bite down, and the top tooth knock against the lower tooth. Hurt so bad that it jolted me awake form my sleep. Omg. Days later, I discovered a good way to avoid this, that is to bit my lips. Biting down on my lips won't hurt, as compared to biting down on my own teeth.

Day 8, yet I am still eating soft food. Hope my teeth move fast and good. I am trying to adapt to br@ces

Moi Virgin Trip to Europe

It was my first time, to somewhere so far away, 12hrs plus for traveling duration and also was away from home for 35 days from Aug to Sep.

Being an unadventurous person, I was surprised that I had actually agreed to this. I always have the phobia to interact with foreigners.

Anyway, I have enjoyed (7/10) the trip especially the expenses for the trips were taken care of by the company. My luggage came to 27kg. Personally, best buy was a small leather wallet for my mum which she really likes it. Also jeans I bought for myself. Plus the cans of radler which I now miss. And the weather too (abit lah). Nah, I hate the food there.

Throughout the trip, I had joined others in sight-seeing and also there were times I wandered on my own. I was happy to mingle with some of these people, some fun (not lonely) times.

Work & Life

I am slightly more than 1 year into my 3rd job. There are some repetitive tasks, which bore me a lot. But what to do? Either I bite on or quit. But its too early now. The people here are quite nice though. And the best thing is that company provides quite ok welfare and benefits. There are activities organised and I do not need to pay a single cent to participate in these - badminton & yoga.

I especially like the yoga sessions by my company. Not only its free, the instructor is good. I later found out he is quite old, but looks boyishly younger than his age. Haha. My attendance is excellent, only missed one session due to some valid reason. I like also because yoga in company has some participation rate from guys. Being so, the yoga attire is simply tee and yoga pants. If you go attend outside atas yoga studio class, you cannot possibly wear shabby tees, when the other ladies wear skimpy tight yoga tops. And lights are switched off, its comfy and less self-conscious to do yoga in the dark, though you still can see how your colleagues perform in yoga. A session outside cheapest will cost $5 at community centre. Atas one can cost you $30 per session.

Badminton, initially I was not that determined but a female colleague wanted me to accompany her so.. my attendance also one of the best. Realise its really good to sweat it out so much, for someone so lazy to jog. I never like jogging cos its boring.

There are comments that I look energetic as compared to when I first joined this company. They think its because I took up all these regularly. I don't notice this myself but I suppose its true.

I am so proud of myself that I had successfully pierced my right ear lobe. I did it last year. I got my first piercing at 15. Fourteen years later, the remaining one succeeded after several tries. I already developed phobia after so many failed attempts.

Life at 30. I know I have little chance of changing my life. I do not have much expectation, therefore I remain as how I am now.

My 2nd trip to U$$

My first time there. I just recalled I took Madagascar Crate Adventure that time, and I forgot I did!

 My 2nd trip, I took:

Transformer Ride (x2)
Accelerator (x2)
Waterworld show
Madagascar Crate Adventure
Far Far Away Enchanted Airways Junior Roller Coaster
Puss in Boots Giant Journey Roller Coaster
Sesame Street Spaghetti Space Chase
Revenge of the Mummy

 Do you know that I was so scared in the Enchanted Airways? Can you believe that I closed my eyes for 75% of the time. It is too fast for me, whenever it dives down, I closed my eyes and crouched down as much as possible, got the feeling of falling or being flung away. This is 13 meteres tall. I cannot believe this ride is suitable for kids. But kids seem braver than me. Boohoo.

Next I took the Puss In boots Giant Journey Roller Coaster. I didn't see this during my previous trip. I thought that is less scarier than Enchanted Airways, because the cart seems big, 'secured' and 'safe', and is very colourful and kiddy-looking yeah. Outcome: again I was scared and closed my eyes, when it was diving down. Overall a bit less scarier than Enchanted, but still...

After the 2 roller coasters, which were scarier than what I expected, I initially did not want to go the mummy ride. But I went for it eventually. I closed my eyes, and felt less scarier because this is an indoor ride, and won't get to see the scenery and height.

Conclusion: Even taking junior roller coasters freak me out, I can never take those battlestar rides. Never! I think I am afraid of heights, that's why!

Starting on a New Job Tomorrow!

I was overworked. Ever since I returned from my holiday trip, all the work piled up waiting for me to clear them, on my own. It was payback time, I worked non-stop, although I was tired and wanted to take off. But did not due to the urgency of work (neither did I wish for any screw up).. I was supposed to deliver.. on my own. I was frustrated, but still worked on grudgingly. I needed a way out of here.

I went on an interview on 1-Apr. They got back to me on 20th. I signed on 22nd. I tendered on 23rd. I start afresh tmr!

This was my first resignation, and this turned out pretty bad, from what I had imagined. I have seen many others who resigned happily.. but why mine ended up so sour initially? Boss was a bit ann0yed at first. This made me very sad. I was a low profile person. But the news of my resignation spread fast and soon, everyone knew. Even I did not tell any third person. The funny thing is, my leaving motivated others to look for jobs.. I am the third to do so in my coy this year.

After some time, Boss seemed ok. Anyway, through the notice period, I was still very busy, doing hand-over and completing my half-jobs. But I was definitely happier during this period, things just don't bother me as much as before, haha. I took zero mc this year and had many leaves left. I took a few days leaves towards the end and enca&h the rest. Boss had farewe|| lunch for me and another girl. Another small group of colleagues had an informal one with me. Boss had bought me dessert on another occasion and bought me a gift. All these gestures made me sad to leave actually, which  I never thought I would be. Sometimes made me wonder, why did I leave, this isn't that bad?

Anyway, I have rested a few days and abit scared for tmr. All the best! Do well! Be sociable and happy! Hope this new coy will be a better one!

No more warding off evil from today onwards..

It's a scary, scary world.

Evil prevails at my place. Sigh, the talisman is gone today. The talisman is a wee bit too strong that many cannot take it and hence they want to have it tore down.

However, is it too strong for me too? I don't know, all along I am quite neutral towards it, maybe I am strong too, so it is ok for me, or maybe.. I have yet to witness its full power. Whatever the reason is, I still find the presence of the talisman beneficial to the place - it can curb the devils from romping around, disturbing innocent people.

What baffles me, is that why do the people not see the pros of having the talisman around? And the talisman actually lost to the devil? I cannot believe it. 

The talisman is taken down so easily. And the sad thing is that people actually rejoiced when it is taken down. Don't they foresee trouble loom ahead of them? The devil triumphs and starts to critisize the talisman.. oh no - I don't like it.

People do not value talisman, for what it has done and helped those poor victims. I respect and support the talisman (secretly), because it has done something which nobody here would do or dare to do. The people here are a weird lot, poor judgment. The talisman must be angry & sad, and disappointed with the lot.

Training and bosses

I went on a course. The building facilities is bad, no toilet paper provided in toilets, though they are old but clean.

My thing of the month came. Heavy. No toilet paper, how convenient! There is no bin to throw our cotton.

One day, I stained the chair. I was so worried that it will leave the ugly stain on it. I thought of how to clean up that stain.. Then I went for lunch.

Fast forward, when I came back, the stain was miraculously gone! That chair was purple.. and I think the fluid got absorbed fully INTO the chair's sponge such that it was no longer visible on the surface. I was so happy. Yucks. But I really like this kind of chair. I can't help it that I left too much of my DNA embedded in that chair.

I realise, being chatty, is a characteristic of a boss. Have you ever met bosses who are quiet? No, right? People who set up their company have the gift of gab. If not, how do they clinch deals, pacify or entertain their customers? I wonder if I ever get the chance to be a boss myself, set up my own company...

Bosses drive. Enjoy attention. Have to act like a boss, be generous and pick up the tabs. Be (abit) hypocritical, 看风使舵。Always do things for a purpose. Dress presentably and maturely. Be confident. Do networking.

Will I be able to do all these?

Sad.. Took L-R- T for the second time...

So, how is my work so far? 4 months since my last post - I am still surviving. Quite busy most of the times. Except for days which I feel really tired, I would slow down my pace, slack a little.

Except for boss, the rest of the people are so so, and a few are annoying people. Hope they won't come and bother me.

Last Saturday - I took L-R- T. Suddenly felt like doing thing which I rarely do. Can you believe it, I live at see-see-k, but have only taken this mode of transportation TWICE! Well, there is no station near my house :( Anyway, the train is jerky. Definitely must hold on to the handrail. Even now MRT nowadays also very jerky. Unlike in the past I could fold my arms and stand steadily without any support.

Money is very important. It is the root of all evil. Without it, you would be miserable.With too much of it, you can stray bad. Felt sad last weekend.

Btw, I don't mind gaining a little more flesh, because skinny girls are less pleasant to the eyes. Flat, 没看头。When you wear sleeveless, it surely looks better if you have some flesh. I realise my shoulders area is abit too angular. It does not make me look womanly.  I am missing curves.Therefore I am always a girl... not a woman.

Three months plus into my new job..

Hope I will not make any more mistake.

Past mistakes haunt me!

5.5 days in SIP

Things happen when you least expect it. Like, how I was in my job seek, I avoided jobs that require travel, cos I am afraid to travel and interact with people of other nationalities. Why? I am quiet in nature and I am so afraid of the awkwardness when I do not understand when they are saying, due to culture & language differences.

And my first work trip to Suzh0u begun 2 weeks ago, and here I am back for 1 week already. Throughout the trip I was very alert (because when you are in a foreign land, you have to be-careful). I sort of cannot believe that I went there and came back! The trip went pretty ok. But I am more daunted by what awaits me back at sg, all the tasks needed to do. I am so scared I cannot perform to expectation back in sg.

We stayed at Su|sse Place, quite a nice hotel, clean and big, but the downsides are that my room has no wifi and the area where the hotel is situated in, is quite a boring place. We would prefer some shopping malls nearby, you see. Typical sgreans, haha. The hotel staff are very nice & welcoming, much more smiley than in H-K.

It was so damn cold at about 11 degrees Celsius. The chilling wind. We took a open air ride around the lake area and became frozen!

Then we started work. Not bad, we learned quite something. People there are very patient and nice. They were very appreciative of the gifts we bought for them. And a few did thank us personally. So sweet of them. They even bought some makan stuff for us to bring back. Me is so touched. Took pictures of all of us. And I so respect the engr over there! Idol!

They showed us around, for two nights, after work. And even gave us an expensive dinner treat, which made them quite heart-pain. Haha. Paiseh to snap pictures of the food, so never.

Some of the food we ate our own. This is Hunan cuisine, all filled with chili.

Some other pics!

Toured USS

I have finally visited USS yesterday, and spent about 6.5 hours over there.

Sat in 5 rides - the transformer, the accelerator (teacup one), treasure hunter (slow jeep), rapid adventure (round boat) and the carousel x2. Haha, all were non-thrilling rides. There was a downpour later on, so that was all for the rides.

Actually nothing much there. (I mean nothing much for timid people)

Some pics..

Life is a blur...

Because time passes too fast! I have been without income for 1 month.

Up next, cny is approaching. Many chores yet to be done. Even my room. Given my non-working status, I should be free right. But no, browsing for jobs to apply takes a lot of time. Some days, after searching one whole day for suitable roles to apply to, I could not even find any.

Since no income, I never bought new tops. Only one new pants. $29. No shoes. Wear old ones will do. Last time I always stock up under wear whenever I saw SALE. So I have new spare ones to wear. Yeah.

No income very cham. Always think twice before I spend. Do I really need it? So if I spend, I will spend it at the supermarket. Tidbits..

Less than two weeks.. HUAT AH!

Why aren't you giving me a call?

These days, I have been waiting for your call. Up to now, it seems like in vain.

Don't tell me you never intended to give me a call? Why?

You are a nice company. You will pay & reward me well. Likewise, I will slave for you. We will work out, and you know I have liking for you. Our last meeting, my heart was beating fast, and being nervous, I blurted the wrong things. But you know I am an honest girl. You ought to give me a chance. Really.

Come on, call me, ask me out at your place and I am most willing to sign above the dotted line. I will be yours, if you are willing.

~A desperate girl

Memories from young..

The topic of how I had behaved as a toddler came up when I saw pictures of toddlers who put their fingers in their mouth and also saliva dripping from their mouths.

I asked my mum and she said I was hygienic when I was a baby. No sucking of finger, no saliva dripping. Yeah, I am so proud of myself, that I started well. The bad thing is that I eat too slow, and I wasn't that cute.

According to her, I was very smart, at about the age of 3, in the middle of a night, I soiled my shorts/panties. So I went to get a new pair and changed it by myself in the bathroom without switching on the lights (I couldn't reach the switch), and threw the soiled shorts at a corner of the bathroom. Of course, this as guessed by my parents when they saw the shorts in the morning, and had asked if I had changed by myself. I said yes. I have no recollection of this.

But I do have recollection, of passing motion in the bathroom. Then my dad or mum came and taught me not to pass motion in the bathroom, cos the gold nuggets cannot be flushed away in the bathroom and I should have used the toilet instead. I don't know what happen to the nuggets, I believe, picked up and disposed by my dad. Haha. I related this to my mum and she cannot remember this incident.

Other recollections of mine includes, an insect (cockroach or beetle) landed on my foot, when I was about to sleep. I asked my dad to catch it. I kept very still throughout. If it were now, I would have screamed and shaked it away. Haha. I slept alone on a mattress on a floor. The position where I slept, I could see the deities figures on the 神台 in the living room. Once I dreamt the figures were moving about. Not sure if this was a dream.

I also remember, my mum would piggyback me and my bro in the house, just for fun. My bro and I were quite noisy and always bickering over children's boliao stuff, and I was fierce.. always scolding my bro. My bro is naughty when we were bigger. We had pillow fights. I was smaller, and he would threw pillows at me, making me fall on my mattress. We liked jumping on the spring mattress. All these took place in our old house.

I asked weird questions. I was very young when I asked my mum, where do people go after they are dead. I cannot remember the answer, but I was feeling very down and sad when I asked that. I thought, how come people become motionless when dead, can't they just move their limbs? Like how I am able to move myself freely. I can control where my hands are placed at, how I can wave them, how my legs can move as I run. Then I question myself, how come I can control my movement, but not other people's movement? I was puzzled, haha.

It was fun and lively when we were still kids. Now no longer. As adults, we have to work, we are tired physically. We like to laze around doing nothing instead of jumping around like monkeys. What is happiness to us? Are we truly happy?

Oh no! I will be j0bles5 Soon!

I must be the most unlucky person ever in my company! It happened twice! Damn it! Why has it got to be me? There are at least half a dozen of lazy and taiji people around, why is it ME? Neither am I an MC king!

Come on! Bear with me, let me whine. I'll stop when I get tired. Sigh, life is never fair. I have seen lousier people getting so easy along their work. I am not fantastic, but at least I do what I need to do. Why is my luck so rotten to the core?

My mind is so sharp today that I don't even doze at all! Wonder if I am able to sleep tonight (now). My disappointment is making me heavy with thoughts. Yes, anger, I do feel it building up. Blame it on those who made this happen? Or blame myself for always making the wrong decision?  I am relatively young, but why am I experiencing this kind of shit!

Nobody can tell me why. Its my life. What can I do? Move on lor..

Watched.

Caught a movie last week. It was freezing cold in the cinema. And came out with a 'jetlag'. The movie was alright, very typical storyline. But no complaint, free de mah.

Yummy Steamboat

What is so nice about steamboat, I used to wonder. Now I am liking steamboat more.

Everyday :-(

I really have no idea what I want in life. I am still young. I live life as mundane as just passing every another day. Each day is such a similarly normal everyday, not a happy day, occasionally a sad one.

Why am I not so happy everyday? Because there's something wrong with me?

I feel I am becoming more of a grumpy person, so I went out to have fun. Don't know why I am still feeling the same after that. How can I be a happier person?

I am not a Good Horse

There's this saying, 好马不吃回头草, and by going back to that place, I am not a good horse. I have heeded the advice of many - 骑驴找马, haiz. Its a different position and still a contract. I don't like it here, the only thing that I like, is at the end of the month :-(

No more motivation, feeling tired every night, moody all day.. these are signs that tell me that, I have to continue seeking.

Jia You, Jon!

I can RIDE~~

The most rewarding thing happened to me throughout the incomeless period, is learning how to ride on a bicycle.

I finally can ride on a normal size one, on my 4th attempt. Yeah, I am happy to the max. I am thinking of buying a cheap bike (of course not now), to ride at the connector park in my neighbourhood for leisure. One thing holding me back is the space constraint in my house, and I don't like the idea of putting my things on the corridor outside.

And also my b day is over. I thought it would be a sad one, again due to my incomelessness. However, it was quite ok. Though I did rot at home. Heheh.